Its been awhile
Its Been awhile since I took the time to blog. I love to blog, but I just kind of got bogged down with things to take the time to do this. Blogging has always been a way of sharing my thoughts, my concerns and even fears. Over the years I have took you through my journey in school, my journey's being without a job, the journey through my first time in radio through the present. I can say that its been real, I guess sometimes too real for some. I've always wanted to be transparent. I don't want to be one of the "fake" people as my sister calls them, they have a face for everybody. There was a song that Earth, Wind and Fire had out and the opening line said "Its funny that how you feel shows on your face", that me.
Matt had surgery number two back in January. They reversed the ileostomy. That was a journey that neither of us expected to have to take. I think we are still shell shocked by it all. I am thankful for the moment in the day when, he is able to sleep mostly through the night, or not in a lot of pain, or able to eat a meal without being sick. I used to take all of these things for granted before. I don't now. I am also thankful when I can get a good nights sleep. sometimes people don't really know what you go through. I was listening to a song at work, really listening and it talked about how we are so busy with our own world that we forget others and it said "look out the window, can't you see a world that's dying". This journey has test my faith. I remember once laying across my praying place and telling the Lord, I have no place to go, but to You which is true. I remember my like without Jesus in it. It was just a go through the motions, try to place everyone type of life. I learned very early that you cannot please everyone. As I said this journey has also tested Matts faith as well. He hasn't been saved all that long. He has some amazing insight on things. We are trying to figure out the purpose in all of this.
I have learned a lot in this phase of the journey. God is faithful. We only see parts of the big picture. As Joseph told his brothers what the devil meant for evil, God has turned it around for good. All I can say that Matt's life was spared. After almost a year of nagging him to go to the doctor, he finally went. I noticed some things I was worried about. I missed the oblivious one. The concern was he stayed tired all of the time. He would have trouble with his stomach which caused some problems. After the first surgery they did a pathology report and it concluded that he had stage one colon cancer. The amended report said that he had stage one B colon cancer. God directed him to the right doctors who referred him to the doctors at UVA. In that chain of events he is doing well. I guess the thing I have feared the most was the financial end. I know that hospitals and surgeries are expensive. I had two cornea transplants and the surgeries came to around twenty thousand dollars. Matt has been reading a book from David Jeremiah called "What are you afraid of" when he finishes I am going to read it. He worries about things as well. The doctor told him last week that his full time job right now was to get well. They have told him at his job don't worry. SO we are trying not to.
I started back to school. I had too much time invested in this not to come out with a degree. It wasn't the one I wanted, but it is something. I like that the classes are online. Despite popular rumors online classes are much harder. I think they figure you have more time to concentrate or to do schoolwork so they really sock it to you. I end up writing a lot of papers each week. I do it in the evenings or about midnight. Matt is sleeping so it is quiet. I am back at work, that helps. I am able to pick up some extra shifts. Right now I can use them. I am just hoping that I can work extra. I think about my mom a lot. I am so glad she instilled in us to be able to take care of ourselves. My dad did the same thing, but he is a softie when it comes to me and Sharon. My mom had a cast iron determination that we would be able to work and take care of ourselves. Even if we got married the husband could lose a job or get sick. She saw this with my dad, he lost a finger in the mines and she had to go to work at various times to keep things going. Her philosophy is you do what you have to do.
It was nice to be able to share with you again.
Matt had surgery number two back in January. They reversed the ileostomy. That was a journey that neither of us expected to have to take. I think we are still shell shocked by it all. I am thankful for the moment in the day when, he is able to sleep mostly through the night, or not in a lot of pain, or able to eat a meal without being sick. I used to take all of these things for granted before. I don't now. I am also thankful when I can get a good nights sleep. sometimes people don't really know what you go through. I was listening to a song at work, really listening and it talked about how we are so busy with our own world that we forget others and it said "look out the window, can't you see a world that's dying". This journey has test my faith. I remember once laying across my praying place and telling the Lord, I have no place to go, but to You which is true. I remember my like without Jesus in it. It was just a go through the motions, try to place everyone type of life. I learned very early that you cannot please everyone. As I said this journey has also tested Matts faith as well. He hasn't been saved all that long. He has some amazing insight on things. We are trying to figure out the purpose in all of this.
I have learned a lot in this phase of the journey. God is faithful. We only see parts of the big picture. As Joseph told his brothers what the devil meant for evil, God has turned it around for good. All I can say that Matt's life was spared. After almost a year of nagging him to go to the doctor, he finally went. I noticed some things I was worried about. I missed the oblivious one. The concern was he stayed tired all of the time. He would have trouble with his stomach which caused some problems. After the first surgery they did a pathology report and it concluded that he had stage one colon cancer. The amended report said that he had stage one B colon cancer. God directed him to the right doctors who referred him to the doctors at UVA. In that chain of events he is doing well. I guess the thing I have feared the most was the financial end. I know that hospitals and surgeries are expensive. I had two cornea transplants and the surgeries came to around twenty thousand dollars. Matt has been reading a book from David Jeremiah called "What are you afraid of" when he finishes I am going to read it. He worries about things as well. The doctor told him last week that his full time job right now was to get well. They have told him at his job don't worry. SO we are trying not to.
I started back to school. I had too much time invested in this not to come out with a degree. It wasn't the one I wanted, but it is something. I like that the classes are online. Despite popular rumors online classes are much harder. I think they figure you have more time to concentrate or to do schoolwork so they really sock it to you. I end up writing a lot of papers each week. I do it in the evenings or about midnight. Matt is sleeping so it is quiet. I am back at work, that helps. I am able to pick up some extra shifts. Right now I can use them. I am just hoping that I can work extra. I think about my mom a lot. I am so glad she instilled in us to be able to take care of ourselves. My dad did the same thing, but he is a softie when it comes to me and Sharon. My mom had a cast iron determination that we would be able to work and take care of ourselves. Even if we got married the husband could lose a job or get sick. She saw this with my dad, he lost a finger in the mines and she had to go to work at various times to keep things going. Her philosophy is you do what you have to do.
It was nice to be able to share with you again.
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